#SHADEsexual: Advice from a Porn Star

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Whether you regularly watch porn or not, chances are you have an opinion about it. And, recently, the subject of lady porn, i.e. erotica made specifically with women's wants and desires in mind, has been gaining attention. After all, the common narrative of what porn is consists of cum shots and, well, pounding, for lack of a better word. Which, suffice to say, many of us find less than hot.
Porn star James Deen (who recently starred with Lindsay Lohan in the non-x-rated film The Canyons) thinks that porn for women isn't necessary, however. He told Refinery29:
"My theory on porn for women is it’s just porn. Why is there porn explicitly only for women? By saying there needs to be porn for women, you’re basically isolating women as a gender, and saying, 'This is how women should think. This is how their sexuality should be.' It’s counterproductive (from what I understand) to the equality movement. Who says that one woman's take on sexuality is the right way to think? One woman might like to watch a film with high production value and beautiful sex. Another might like some BDSM things with beating, degradation—and it doesn’t mean either is right or wrong. Pornography is made for individuals to find what they enjoy, and what turns them on. There’s no market research on this because sexuality is always developing, growing, and evolving. You could talk to a million people about what they like in porn, and you’re going to get a million answers of what a million people like in porn at that moment."
While we like the idea of porn based on preference, not gender, some women (and men!) believe that a lot of porn isn't female friendly and actually degrades women, showing that there seems to be a need for that so-called lady porn. Right?
However, when we asked sex therapist Eric Marlowe Garrison, author of Mastering Multiple Position Sex, for his perspective, he also made the point that, while we might see some porn as degrading, people may actually be turned on by what offends others. Here's where the line is, as far as he's concerned:
"As a general rule, we can consider any porn as 'normal' so long as all the participants—including the actors, production staff, bystanders/onlookers, and the film's intended audience, all of legal age—provided their express consent for their parts during the filming, editing, screening, and viewing of the video regardless of whether we, in our existence as sexual beings, engage in those filmed activities or not." So, basically, as long as no one is forced to do anything or watch anything against his/her will, it should be all good.
He emphasized that each person needs to determine what aspects of porn, if any, are "healthy" for him or herself. "Rather than thinking of porn as sexually explicit, we can reclassify it as sexually relevant," he says. "Because every type of consensual porn is relevant to somebody."